I am aware that there has been some debate recently about whether it is appropriate for gay couples to adopt in New Zealand.
And, when American President, Barack Obama announced his support for marriage equality, Paul Cameron of the Family Research Institute claimed that ‘Obama might be gay’ and several other outrageous claims in relation to child safety around people who are gay.
I find this all rather twisted and homophobic, because I grew up with a gay Dad. And when I turned 18 I chose to go live with Dad and his partner at the time.
And on an interesting note, recently my Mum has expressed that she could be ‘part gay’. Now my Mum has been re-married for nearly 15 years, so I had to ask her what she meant by this. And she explained that if she had not found her current husband, she would be comfortable having a partner of the same sex for the sake of companionship.
In my opinion I was fortunate to have had this kind of upbringing. I understand and accept without question a gay lifestyle. And if we set aside the people that ‘party hard’ – gay or straight – a gay lifestyle is not that far removed from a straight one. In fact it can be full of well dressed people with super interior design skills! And, they could even be ‘cucumber sandwich camp!’ which is great fun!
I learnt from both my parents that dressing well is important.
I learnt from both my parents that there is a social etiquette – and if you’re going to have a drama or meltdown in public, there better be a good reason, and you best look good doing it.
Funnily enough this really has sunk in. I have injured myself many times in public. For example, put my back out on the bus, fallen over, jammed a finger in a door. And I just get up and keep going, as if nothing happened. Sure I might be in a huge amount of pain, but where is the point in creating excessive drama over it? It is more logical to ‘Keep calm and carry on. And don’t forget to straighten ones skirt and check the hairdo.’
If anything the most difficult and potentially damaging thing that happened, was Mum and Dad separating when I was 6 years old.
So, in my opinion all the recent debate about whether gay couples should adopt or have children is a waste of time and energy.
There is no greater risk to children. I am just as messed up as any other human, and not for the fact that I have a gay parent.
Gay is ok! Is it ok with you?